Tsunami

I know all of you must have heard about this terrible catastrophy that has taken place in what is known as "the ring of fire." It boggles my mind...I just cant grasp what has happened because it is simply unbelieveable. I urge you to give, in some way shape or form, even $10. These people are left with nothing, they have lost family, friends, homes, identities, food, clothes, everything.

I dont know if you listen much to Christmas music, but out of many favorites, there is one that always strikes me as a pure example of why Christ came. It is one of those collaborative efforts by many famous singers called "Feed The World." One line Bono sings says "their biggest gift this Christmas will be life." Another line says, "do they know it's Christmas time at all?." I think it strikes to the heart of what we take so for granted in our fabulously wealthy, privileged, supersized, comfy lives. If your family had lost everything, and you were sitting on a hillside with no clothes on, no water to drink or food to eat, no shelter to hide yourself from the weather, wouldnt you hope and pray someone somewhere would help. Please help. Even if you have to take back a few of the gifts you got this Christmas. Even if you have to give up your daily latte or special night out to the movies. Let these people know the world feels their pain. Let them know that you share their pain and that you care.

Here is some information I saw posted on a message board about organizations that are gathering funds for the relief. There are many to choose from, and remember, $20 US goes a long way. God will remember your kindness, it says in his word, "Whatever you have done unto the least of these you have done to me."

Here is the information

Posted: Dec 30 2004, 10:26 AM




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Asian disaster: How to help

So far the British government has given £15m ($29m) and the British public has matched that with an additional £15m ($29m).

Here's something from the BBC website on more ways to donate. Agree with you Elias, that we need to go beyond giving now - on into the future..


Global aid organisations have launched urgent appeals for donations to help survivors of Sunday's Indian Ocean earthquake disaster.

Nearly 80,000 people are confirmed killed by the waves and millions more are homeless.

Many governments and organisations - including the US, Canada, Australia, the EU and the UN - are sending aid.

The UN has warned that supplies are urgently needed to support the survivors and to try and prevent disease which, it says, could double the death toll.

The Disasters Emergency Committee - www.dec.org.uk - is an umbrella group of UK aid organisations - including ActionAid, British Red Cross, Oxfam - working to provide clean water, food and shelter to thousands.

The United Nations World Food Programme - www.wfp.org - is seeking donations to feed victims of the earthquake.

Medecins Sans Frontieres - www.msf.org - is sending aid workers to the region, focusing on medical care for survivors and displaced people after the rescue operations.

Oxfam - www.oxfam.org.uk - is providing emergency supplies, including water tanks, pumps, taps and temporary toilets for families left homeless by the floods. The charity raised £600,000 in the three days after the disaster, including £200,000 on Tuesday - the most it has raised in one day.

Islamic Relief - www.islamic-relief.com - has also launched an appeal to provide medical supplies, tents and sanitation facilities for those affected.

The United Nations Children's Fund, Unicef - www.unicef.org.uk - is working to meet the "urgent needs of hundreds of thousands of people" affected by the tsunami disaster.

Save the Children - www.savethechildren.org.uk - has already flown a plane out to Sri Lanka carrying plastic sheeting for temporary shelter, tents to run children's services from, and essentials such as clothing and cooking utensils.

Anti-poverty organisation Care International - www.care.org - has already provided food for thousands of affected people in Sri Lanka.

Cafod, the Catholic Agency for Overseas Development - www.cafod.org.uk - is working with partners across Asia to provide shelter, food aid and medical assistance, and assessing what further relief is needed.

The Islamic Aid Emergency Relief Fund - www.islamicaid.org.uk - aims to provide immediate relief and long-term support to people in the affected areas.

Another Islamic charity, Muslim Hands - www.muslimhands.org- is collecting money and sending volunteers to help in Indonesia and Malaysia.

UK residents can donate via the British Red Cross - www.redcross.org.uk - which has launched an appeal to fund supplies including blankets and cooking utensils.

Medair - www.medair.org - is providing emergency support to agencies with a long term presence in Sri Lanka and its medical experts are assessing the likelihood of malaria and diarrhoea.

World Vision - www.worldvision.org.uk - has also launched an appeal and has already delivered relief goods to thousands.

Christian Aid - www.christianaid.org.uk - has already allocated £250,000 from its emergency fund to help the victims of this disaster but says more money is needed.

Christian charity Tearfund - www.tearfund.org - and its partners in Sri Lanka and India are helping devastated fishing communities and coastal villages get back on their feet.

Concern - www.concern.net - is working with local partners to meet the needs of families in the devastated coastal villages of Tamil Nadu, the worst affected state in India.

The International Rescue Committee - www.theirc.org - is providing emergency supplies and materials to "people most affected by the crisis".

The Salvation Army - www.salvationarmy.org.uk has local teams working in a number of affected areas and is sending a team from its international headquarters on Wednesday evening.

Muslim Aid - www.muslimaid.org - has already donated £100,000 towards the purchase of food, clothing and medicine in the region but wants to raise more.

Asia Quake Relief Appeal UK, a UK-based Sri Lankan organisation, is also raising money and can be emailed at asia-quakerelief@europe.com

You can donate to all the campaigns via their websites.

yesterday

I know I just did a post for today, but I had to write about something that happened yesterday.

I have been running around like a chicken with it's head cut off trying to take care of odd errands before I head to Washington to visit my family and leave my husband to record an album with 12 of his best friends...(grimaces) another story. Anyway, yesterday I went to get the oil changed and took my daughter along. Not the wisest thing to do with a toddler, but it had to be done and there was no way to get around it.

So during the hour and a half wait I strolled my daughter over to the bank, made the deposit, walked back to the car place to check in, waited a little bit before loading her back up and heading to Mickey D's (McDonalds for those of you not hip to the word on the streets.) I had $4 cash and some change, so I got two hamburgers and a small fry and we strolled back to the car place to eat it. (You know what I was really wanting...that's right, the Big and Tasty.)

Not long after that the oil change was finished, so we jumped in and headed for home. But wait...my husband really wanted to get the car washed (I admit it was looking pretty rough) and just hadnt had time. I decided to swing into the "do-it-your-self" place and do it for him. It would be a great surprise. The only problem was I had exactly $1.25, and that was enough to get the machine running. I would have to work real fast to get in a soapy brush scrub and a rinse.

As soon as that machine started up I was furiously scrubbing that car, I didnt even bother wetting it down. Front, sides, back, windows, roof, as fast as I could. Only got tangled in the cord once which probably cost me a few seconds, but then I was back. I ran over to the dial to switch it to the insanely intense rinse, grabbed the hose and started spraying. Then suddenly the thing shut off. WHAT??? No warning beeps?! But, but, the car is still covered in bubbles! What am I going to do? I have no cash left what-so-ever and my black car is COVERED in white foamy bubbles!

I look around and notice this guy watching me, probably waiting to see what this white girl with the "fancy Scion" is gonna do about her bubble covered car. Then I see a big group of people waiting for the bus. I cant drive out of here covered in bubbles!!! I decide to call my husband and ask for help. "Im in the middle of a disaster and I dont know what to do! I tried to surprise you by washing the car but I ran out of money and now it is covered in bubbles!" "Just drive it home and we will finish washing it here...I'll get the hose ready." "NO! I cant drive our car thru the hood covered in bubbles! Cant you just bring me some change?" "I dont have any cash either," he said. "You just have to drive it home."

I am giggling out of pure embarrassment as I get back in the car and start it up. The guy is still watching me. I pull out of the stall in my bubble covered car with my face as red as....Ok, just really red. I put on my shades and tilt my head back in the look of "Ya, I know there's bubbles on my car. Whatchoo gonna do about it?" Im driving along and bubbles are blowing off the back of the car in the wind. I pull in the driveway and there is my sweet husband waiting with the hose to salvage what is left of my big surprise.

Of course I hadnt had any time or change to vaccuum the car out, but I had him take it back up there to do it. It will be a while before I make an appearance at that Amoco station.

more random thoughts

Here are a few more.

1. On behalf of all mothers everywhere, if you see us approaching a door with a child (or two) in hand feel free to open it for us. We wont be offended or protest that we are being squelched of our feminist rights to open the door ourselves. And you can feel great about your random act of kindness for the day.

2. No, Im not a teenager. Yes I know I look it.

3. Do you ever wonder who was the first person "create" cookie dough? Who decided a little flour, some eggs, butter, and sugar would become something tasty. And along those lines, just what is baking powder? What is baking soda? And why does vanilla contain alcohol?

4. They've just come out with Hershey's mini kisses. Arent those called chocolate chips?

5. Nick and Jessica just admitted to creating drama over their marriage to take the heat off of her sister Ashley over the SNL catastropy. I cant decide if that is a really sweet sisterly gesture, or another example of Jessica having one of her "blonde" moments.

Merry Christmas 2004

Hi folks, I have already posted this on a message board I like to visit, but thought it was fitting for my blog. Merry Christmas!

Hope you all are having a great time celebrating with family and friends on the day we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. We had a little celebration here at our home today, and then we will have my husband's family over and celebrate again later this week. (Let's see how many times I can use the word "celebrate" in one post.)

I have a funny story to tell. We went to Christmas Eve service last night and at the end of service we celebrated :) communion. Well there was a family behind us with three young boys...probably 4-10 years old. The guy behind me was about 8. After they passed out the juice cups we were all waiting to drink and suddenly we heard his cup break....and then I felt drops of grape juice landing in my hair! (we were in a balcony section so i was a little below him.) I grabbed my hair as a natural reaction and laughed a little when I felt grape juice drops all over it. Then the boy's mom realized it had gotten on me and started scolding him, he was mumbling that the juice was leaking out of the broken cup and he didnt know what to do. At the same time the pastor asked us to drink and then we started singing the final song. The boy's family got up to leave quickly and he said a humble, "Sorry," as he left. I smiled and told him "Dont worry! No big deal," and as he walked away I noticed a great big grape juice stain on his chair. Poor fella. As a kid there's not much worse than holding a tiny broken cup of grape juice and having to sit there while it leaks all over your lap...and spilling it on the lady sitting in front of you! Hope he had a better day today. And hope all of you had a wonderful Christmas.

Random observations

On a lighter note I decided to post a few random observations that have no relationship to one another, but are silly, lighthearted, or just....random.

Have you noticed the guy on the Stetson commercial looks like Matthew McConaughey's long lost brother?

I dont think Madonna has any clue that her guest appearance on Will & Grace (which I dont watch but just happened to see clips of) was terrible. I really think she believes she is good. She said her fans just wont allow her to be an actress because they see her only as a singer. Hmmm.

It takes someone very special to write a Christmas classic. We've been listening to a lot of Christmas music, and if you are like me there is always one singer who sings the song "right." All the others are like Marilyn McCoo on Solid Gold. They change up the style, pause in the wrong places, etc. It is a delicate art.

Billy Gilman is my husband's nemesis. He and "Jay" Tyra Banks' sidekick on "America's Next Top Model."

My love affair with Hot Pockets has ended.

And those are my random thoughts for today.

A brand new day

Because I dont know who all reads this thing, I thought I should give a quick update on my status. The procedure went well--no complications, and I am feeling really good. I am thankful to be thru the mess and on the other side. We are all amazed at how quickly I have recovered, I guess because the whole thing has been so much drama from the beginning it is weird to think its finally over. I guess I've done so much crying the past week that all I feel now is overwhelming relief! Thanks so much for your kind words and prayers. We are looking forward to Christmas with family...it will be the first Christmas our daughter will be old enough to appreciate.

One more thing

I really dont like the way I ended that last post. There are two things I needed to add. First, what I am thankful for in this experience. I am really thankful that I had the chance to see the baby alive, for just a moment. I am thankful God afforded me that opportunity. And second, what I have learned from this experience. I have learned that I need to take more time to consider what my fellow human beings might be going thru. Sitting in that office the day I knew the baby was gone put me in a position that forced me to consider how it must have been for other women in my same predicament. And that made me very sympathetic to the lives of those around me. I have been made more aware of the people sitting near me, walking past me, driving in front of me. Who knows what they might be going thru...the death of a loved one, the break up of a relationship, a terrible illness. I need to be kind. I need to show love. And I need to be patient. The person walking too slow in front of me might be me. How would I wish to be treated? Anyway, that is how i should have ended the post.

Here's what happened

I dont want to gross anyone out, but for my own peace of mind I need to write this down so I can get on with things. At this point i am feeling much better, and so is Nate. We have accepted things and are moving forward for the most part. But I guess putting it all in words allows me a type of closure so here goes.

Remember the post about Thanksgiving in which I said for #1 "If all goes well I will tell you about this one later"? Well, at Thanksgiving we announced to the family that we were expecting. At that point I was about 6 weeks pregnant, or so I thought. In retrospect we should have waited until our first doctor appointment, but we had waited so long with our first child that this time we wanted to be spontaneous and celebrate with the family. My first appointment was scheduled for the 8th of December, and we promised to fill everyone in on what we learned.

It was quite a fiasco that day. We decided to bring our daughter to the appointment to see the "baby" (she really had no clue what was going on,) and she got real antsy real quick, reminding us why parents should never take their toddlers to important meetings. The doctor did the ultra sound and asked me again how far along I believed I should be. Something wasnt adding up. The baby appeared to be growing a week behind what it should be. My doctor set my baby at 5.4 weeks, rather than 7 weeks, told me it was nothing to be alarmed about but definitely something to watch, and scheduled me an appointment for the following week to check on things. At 5 weeks it is impossible to detect much of what is going on, but at 6-7 weeks there should be a heartbeat and more can be determined. So we went home a little disconcerted, but patiently waiting for that next appointment the following Friday.

Well unfortunately Tuesday evening before the second appointment I started bleeding just a little, which is somewhat common (about 30% of all pregnancies have some sort of bleeding and go on to full term babies.) Wednesday morning I awakened and immediately believed i was having a miscarriage. The doctor told me to come right in, they would do an ultra sound. I set off on my own (we couldnt bring our daughter along this time) and the whole 40 minute drive there assumed the worse. I was ok, but trying to accept what might be happening. I arrived and checked in, went to take a seat, and as I looked around the room a strange reality hit me. I was sitting in a room full of pregnant ladies in all shapes and sizes, and the fate of my baby was yet to be determined. i saw a couple to my right looking fondly at the ultra sound photos they had just gotten of their precious little one. And as they glanced up at me and smiled, I was struck with the notion that that might have been me just two year before. It's so easy to assume everyone there is pregnant and happy. Maybe one of the women I'd sat next to not so long ago had been wondering the fate of her child.

When I was called in and the ultra sound began I stared up at the screen and caught my first real look at our little guy. And there was a heartbeat! The technician was very encouraged seeing the heartbeat and told me that things looked good, although the baby was still growing one week behind pace! I was crying and desperate to talk to my husband, but the "no cell phones" signs scattered around the office had made it clear I wouldnt be able to call him until after the appointment. They called in my doctor and we spoke for just a moment. He told me the heartbeat was a very good sign, but to realize that I had two big question marks that we needed to get answers to before things were in the clear--the bleeding, and the slow growth. I needed to go back in the following week at 7 weeks, at which time a strong heartbeat and steady growth would give me a less than 5% chance of miscarriage.

That was Wednesday. By the following Wednesday (the 15th) I knew something was wrong. My sickness had steadily decreased since the appointment, and my stomach was also changing. While just a few days before I had had trouble bending over, i had begun to experience the softening of the uterus, and could easily do things I couldnt do a few days prior. I had a huge breakdown and told my husband that i feared the worst. However I was still having aversions to foods, which was confusing me. He begged me to hang in there until Friday and let the doctor tell exactly where things stood.

Well, on Friday we learned the baby was gone. He had probably passed that same day the bleeding started, and we had caught his last moments at the previous ultrasound. I think the absolutely most difficult part of the entire saga is that the baby still has not "left me." I am still walking around with the baby that will not be. Of course they give you the option waiting to have a full miscarriage, or having a DnC (cant tell you what it stands for.) The earliest I could get in was tomorrow, Tuesday. So I could sure use some prayers.

But to be clear, the hardest part has passed. We are at peace with things, aside from the final step. Once that has happened i will feel much better about moving on. I am very scared about the procedure, but it has to happen so we just have to do it. Anyhoo, sorry about the not so fun post, but I guess if Im gonna write about my life, it would be wrong not to include something so significant.

Sorry

I promise to write more as soon as I have a little time to tell you what has been going on around here. It has been a tough week, for a number of reasons, and not being sure how to explain it has kept me from writing. But I need to write down what has happened, and so I will. It just might be later today before I get to it. To put it simply, I've had a miscarriage.

Thank you

Thanks so much for the encouraging words from everyone about my birthday. I hope you know I play it up a little for the blog to make it sound more interesting. Really, it was disappointing, but not so bad. And now it is a new day, and life goes on! Life is a lot more than silly hats, cake, ice cream, and gifts. But the celebrations help separate the regular days from each other! Now it's on to Christmas...:o :)

I will write more soon, but I must make dinner. Thanks again!

(When I say "play it up a bit" I mean the disappointment. All the facts are true.)

Happy blah blah blah

Yeah, it's my birthday. Whoopie. I have decided not to celebrate today. I choose tomorrow to be that once a year event that is supposed to outshine all other days (except of course Christmas and Easter.) It just isnt working out today. So Ive postponed it.

I'll give you a recap of the day's events up til now (2pm Eastern time). I awakened at 5am with a nightmare that my daughter had been kidnapped and my husband was running around doing nothing about it. Yes, it was just a dream, but it takes a minute to fall back asleep after something like that. It also takes a minute to fall back to sleep when your husband is still up rustling around trying to finish his work for the night/morning. Finally he goes to bed at 5:30am. And I just drift off when...what? The girl is crying! I guess she had the same dream I did because bright and early at 6am she's crying hysterically. Finally after trying to console her and realizing she is basically still asleep just disoriented from her dream, I leave her and head back to bed. But not for long since her usual wake up time is 7:30am and she's up and at em right on schedule. No special sleeping in/breakfast in bed today (yeah, right, like it's ever happened before!) Daddy just fell asleep an hour and a half ago. So I yawn, stretch, and accept my fate.

I really did try to move past it, but then (and I cant go into detail because someone I love will read this and I dont want to hurt any feelings) I decided to cheer myself up by opening one gift. Or at least what I thought was a gift. Needless to say I was disillusioned by what I found inside the package, and sat alone on the couch under the Christmas tree pouting while my daughter sang along to her favorite Spot video. Later she began crying over a piece of ice I wouldnt let her hold and I mumbled to myself, "Happy stinking birthday." Of course then I sank into a humiliating guilt trip over my behavior.
"You are a grown woman, this is ridiculous. Stop pouting, kids in Africa dont even get presents. They dont even have a warm house to sleep in. People are desperate for food and your pouting over having to get up early today." I needed a change of scenery. I decided to hit the grocery store.

After buying some cupcakes to cheer me up I called home to see if my husband had awakened. After a short conversation I pause. He says "Well...I love you?" I say, "It's my birthday today." Solid body blow. Of course he apologized profusely and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loves me dearly and certainly would have said it had I given him a chance when I got home. But the moment didnt add anything special to the way my day was going. (On a side note I want to say that my husband is perfect, the love of my life, and Im not trying to paint an ugly picture of him. Ok baby?)

So, here I sit, my husband had to run out for work until 3:00 or so, and Im relaxing alone on the same couch I sat on a few hours before pouting. Here's a little poem I've composed about my day.

"Thirty-two, and life is blue,
what's a girl to do?
Life is hard, without a card,
or something shiny and new.
What will I do, it's twenty til 2,
and here I sit alone?
I'll eat some cake I didnt bake
and then take out a loan!
I'll buy that coat and hat I saw,
and then I'll buy some more.
I wont come round til the sun goes down,
I might sleep at the store!
That will cure my birthday blues,
that will be my fix!
They wont be able to track me down
until Im thirty-six!"

Whew

I finally have a chance to sit down and write! I started a post last night "10 things my husband has to say about me..." but he left it blank, (I know he's got SOMETHING to say, he's just too busy to say it), so I have to start fresh today. Let's see. I guess I will answer a few more from my list of 100 things about me.

Ok, I will start with the second #29 (the one in the middle of the 30's due to my misnumbering!) "I was a rocker chick in high school." Let's face it, wasn't every girl graduating in the late 80's early 90's a rocker chick? No? Well the girls at my school were either that or athletes. I was a little of both until my Junior year, and after that it was all about the music. (ha!)

No, I did not wear fringe (as my husband would have you believe) but I definitely had the "claw" bangs, big hairsprayed hair, tight tight jeans, jean coat, and boots. But that was what we wore! It wasnt like I was a freak at my school, I blended right in!

In regards to music, during high school it was all about the hair. No, just kidding. I guess you could say my favorite groups at that time were Guns-n-Roses, (Use your Illusion 1 and 2 were amazing!) Motley Crue (this was after the "Shout At the D.." stage) Van Halen (late David Lee Roth/early Sammy Haggar was best) and Skid Row. Oh yeah, I also liked Cinderella, Tesla, and The Cult. There were lots of lesser known artists that Im ashamed to mention. Some groups were a little too wimpy for me, like Bon Jovi, Warrant, Winger, and Firehouse (gag.) And other groups were way too hard, like Metallica (remember the story I told about the video for "One"?) Ratt, Anthrax, Megadeath, and those.

After high school I moved to Seattle and happened to experience the birth of grunge first hand. I remember hearing Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" right as the Seattle stations got ahold of it, and my roommate and I were so intrigued. She bought the album and several weeks later we were all playing it regularly. After that it was all about Nirvana, Pearl Jam, and Alice In Chains, (the Seattle bands.) About six months later I came across Red Hot Chili Peppers and that was my rotation for the next year or so.

As time went by I lost track of music for a while. I did like some of the Stone Temple Pilots music, and still liked Nirvana and Red Hot Chili Peppers but didnt follow the rock scene any longer. The take over of pop rap had changed the face of music and I was disillusioned. It was time to toss the tight jeans, grow out the bangs, and embrace the Hammer dance.

Ive got 30 minutes

til the battery on my computer runs out. So I have to think of something quick. Maybe a Top 5 will do.

Top 5 Christmas movies

5. "Elf." I am breaking rules and posting a movie I havent seen, only because I tried twice to see it last year and was called home by the babysitter both times just as the show began. It has created such anticipation in my mind that it is a must see at this point.
4. Do I have to say "It's A wonderful Life?" I will mention it just because my husband says I have to. I know it's a classic and has a great message, but I tell you the truth, I cant take the old style films. I appreciate the art and the purpose, but I lose interest very quickly. This one is for you sweetie.
3." Scrooged." I have great memories about this film. I love Bill Murray (dont forget The Life Aquatic which comes out on Christmas) and although I dont find it as funny as I used to, it still makes my list.
2. "A Charlie Brown Christmas." I just think it has to be listed. It's a classic, especially in my husband's family
1."A Christmas Story". They show it every year, but to me it just gets funnier every time. I watch it once thru then that's it for the season. Happy Holidays!

10 days and counting...

Til my birthday! I will be a whopping 32 years old. It's funny, I remember when my mom was 32 and I was...11! Crazy. It seems like forever ago. And to think my mom was actually so young when I was assuming she was so old!

It's crazy how the blinders are taken off our eyes each year of life. In high school you think you KNOW EVERYTHING. You've reached the top! No one can tell you anything! It doesnt get any better, right? Then you hit college or the work force, and it is a whole new ball game. I think getting a real job is the biggest initiation into adulthood. And getting a house/moving out on your own. Once the bills start rolling in and you realize, "I gotta pay for heat?" "I gotta pay for electricity?" you start to see the big picture. Growing up I didnt think ONCE about paying for lights, water, heat. But I sure did appreciate them. Now it's like you cant open the mailbox without a bill showing up. To me, that is adulthood.

And you start to see things in a whole new perspective as you get older. Suddenly, going out every Friday night just aint gonna happen. And actually, Im not sure I could stay up past 1:00 am. Getting a good night's sleep becomes important. You start to crave "alone time," and "looking cool" takes second place to being comfortable. I think life gets more REAL as you get older. The fantasy begins to fade and reality sets in. Which is good. Because then you are really experiencing life.

howdy

Not much going on around here. More of the same just now. (See post about how every day is the same...)

I need to clean the house, wash the dishes, dust, do a little laundry, etc, but I cant. I just cant. Nope. Dont wanna. No can do. Aint gonna do it. No way no how. Uh-uhn. Instead I am going to rest. Relax. Sit back. Maybe take a nap. Close my eyes. Veg-out. Take it easy. Im not doing it and no one can make me. Do you want to go wash out all the bowls of leftovers I just tossed? Didnt think so. Remember I dont have a dishwasher to do it for me. Do you want to put away all the toys I've been putting away day after day? No? Didnt think so. What I do want to do is get me a big ole Big and Tasty from McDonald's and chow down on it. But Im too lazy. Im just going to sit here and think about how Big and Tasty those Big and Tasty's are. Although I dont always like the chunky onions. I think I will think about getting one without onions. Yeah..there we go. I love that drip of Big and Tasty sauce that always oozes out of the bottom after I take a bite. MMMM. Is that Big Mac sauce? No, I dont think so. Probably just mayo and ketchup mixed. But it always tastes better when McDonald's makes it. My mouth is watering now. And then a little sip of coke to wash it down. which is funny because I dont drink coke, but when I did it always went well with McDonald's. That little "pazazz" kind of "spritz" of bubbly carbonation always went well with the burger. Im lovin it.