...sugar and spice and everything nice...

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Home Sweet Home

We made it! The adventure has come to an end and vacation is over. And actually it went pretty well, if you consider having a 2 year old along for the ride! We traveled down to Clearwater, FL for a week on the beach with my husband's family. It was really nice having a change of scenery and soaking up the sun. It was the first vacation my daughter will remember, and it was great having her 4 year old cousin along to swim, play, eat, and well, be a kid with.

My husband is a big time water lover. Not me. I wish I could get excited about it, but honestly, Im not a big fan. The pool is just too cold, and the ocean is too big. I love to be outdoors, smell the fresh air, feel the wind in my hair, but not the water on my body. At first we feared this might be the case with my daughter too. Every time she got near the water she would begin to freak out and want out. Finally we realized it was because her swimsuit was getting wet. She didnt want her suit to get wet! So we stripped her down to her swim diaper and she spent the rest of vacation swimming with daddy (which was great for me because it got me off the hook, and I had some extra free time!)

I think their are definitely pros and cons to traveling with family. And granted, this wasnt MY family but my husband's family, whom I thoroughly enjoy, so that might make a difference too, but it was certainly fun. The pros are: 1 lots of extra babysitters around, or at least "baby entertainers." 2 parents often want to "treat" you to dinner, movies, or at least an ice cream cone. 3 more people to help clean up the place, do dishes, fix meals. 4 extra conversation topics. 5 it's family!

I would say there really arent many cons, but here are a few that might be considered: 1 not much "alone time" with husband or individual family. 2 occasional awkwardnesses because you are still an "in-law" not one of the original members of the tribe. And 3 discrepancies over taking care of the baby, what food belongs to what family, what we are all doing today, etc.

All in all I really enjoyed myself. In fact, I had a meltdown this morning just so overwhelmed with the reality of life back at home! I miss my extra help! I miss the beautiful weather! I miss doing something different! But that is what makes vacation so special and what helps me appreciate it so much. So until next time, all I have are memories and photos, which I'd love to share with you if I could just figure out how to post them....(reality sets in again....I have so little time to learn any new skills....daughter is crying....house is a disaster....bed is calling....no more glorious dishwasher.....just a sink full of dishes needing to be hand washed.....piles of clothes and vacation things in every corner of the house....) Hmmm, guess we are home sweet home.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Hi friends

Once again it has been forever since Ive posted anything. And once again I apologize. See, pregnancy and me go together like oil and water. The end result is always a beautiful blessing, but getting there is pure disgust to me. I am so thankful that God has given me this opportunity again, especially since we had the miscarriage in december. But these are always the yuckiest days of my life. I am definitely not one of those ladies who just "loves being pregnant." Im not one of those ladies who will go on to have oodles of kids, though i greatly admire them. I am not one of those ladies who likes a challenge (unless it is a boyfriend who became my husband :). But I am one of those people who was an only child (in a matter of speaking but that is a whole different story I may share with you someday,) and I have always wanted to be sure my children have siblings.

I just think it adds to the whole family experience, even if you just have TWO. There are so many things you learn when you have a sibling. Like how to have fun! How to share! How to endure when someone messes up your stuff! How to understand that someone still loves you when they say "I hate you!" How to know that just because someone ignores you for a day they will probably be your best friend again tomorrow! Having someone to play with on vacation, during summer break, when you go visit grandma, when you are bored at some parent party. And then as an adult, someone to talk to about all the wedding stuff, to raise your kids with, to share the burden when your parents get older and ill and need care. People who you will always have even after your parents are gone, in most cases.

Dont get me wrong, I have turned out relatively well adjusted (ahem, at least I think so...) but there were some hard lessons I didnt learn until I was at least college aged. Things other people just grew up used to because they had siblings. At first my husband drove me nuts because he was always "picking on" me. Constant teasing and joking around. I couldnt take it. No one was constantly teasing me at my house--I mean, my mom never made fun of my toes, hastled me about my "tough girl" attitude when I got angry, or relentlessly pursued me during a game of UNO, giving me DRAW FOUR after DRAW FOUR! What was he doing??? Ah-ha, after about three years I realized this is a "love language" that many family members share that I just didnt get. If I had known that years before I might not have been the butt of so many jokes in jr. high and high school! No wonder everyone loved to tease me (in fun), I couldnt take a joke!

I know that many siblings dont get along, and often siblings dont turn out friends or keep in touch. But I guess the idea that it might work out to be some of their best friendships in life encourages me to endure the sickness. So I cling to the toilet bowl telling myself it is all worth it in the long run, and that soon this will end. Thanks to those of you who have stuck around. In a few weeks I should be back to normal ("please Lord?") and posting regularly. Until then, if you stop by and things havent been updated, picture me lying on the couch crumpled up in fetal position trying to acknowledge my daughter now and then.

Monday, May 16, 2005


It is all I can do to think of something to write about. Isnt that pathetic? I could write on and on about how gross I feel now that Im pregnant, but who wants to hear me mope around about that. And I could write about the new deepspace 5 album that dropped May 10th, "Unique, Just Like Everyone Else," which has been getting some rave reviews and features Mars ILL, Listener, Playdough, and the rest of the crew, but I dont usually talk a lot about music on this blog and it seems strange to start now. I could tell you how anxiously I am awaiting my new Relevant magazine, with MOBY on the front cover, that I have already called about and they said I should be receiving but I havent and I really want to take it with me on vacation. Or how sad I am for my baby girl who has had a rough cold for over a week now and just as she is getting over it her top molars have decided to try to peek thru. I could tell you about the Survivor finale last night, which shocked me SPOILER BELOW dont read if you dont want to know!

(SPOILER...dont read if you havent seen it and dont want to be spoiled!)
when Ian snapped under pressure and decided to give up his potential spot in the final two! crazy!


I could also remind you to set your TIVO for the final two episodes of LOST, this Wednesday and next. The internet is a buzz over what may happen to the survivors of the plane crash, and you wont want to miss it! I could also tell you about the beautiful bouquet of flowers/plants I got for Mother's Day from my mom. I have been busy planting them and it has been loads of fun. And how I am a little stressed about the trip we are taking this Friday/Saturday, considering we have no right to be heading out on vacation with what little money we have. But all of that seems a little boring to write about on my blog.

For now I will simply say life is good, a little hectic, a little blah, a little exciting, and definitely worth living. Have a great day!

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

And now for the big guns!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the greatest man alive....at least, the greatest man in my life! (Well, other than God you know, but who can fill those shoes?)

We were crazy enough to get married on Mother's Day weekend, and the day before my husband's birthday, so this has always been a big weekend around our house. Having been married eight years now, and together 12, I've been celebrating birthdays and holidays with my man since he was the ripe old age of 20! Wow, seems like forever ago that we began this journey, yet time seems to have flown by. I thought I would share some of my favorite memories since this is such a memorable weekend for us!

I remember our first date, when he picked me up at the college and took me to church with him to officially meet his family, then we spent the day together and went out that night to dinner and a movie. I didnt realize how far he lived from the college so I hadnt brought any "freshen up" items along with me, or a change of clothes to something more casual. I kept thinking "why did I wear this today?" But he made sure we had lots of fun anyway!

On that very date he invited me to visit Atlanta with him on Spring Break, just three weeks later! We made the 7 hour drive down to see his sister and her boyfriend (now married and living their lives online too at "hula seventy" and "the ward-o-matic" see links at right.) We just so happened to be trapped in the house, the four of us, for several days as the "Blizzard of '93" struck the Southeast! Needless to say we broke up after hours of intense Uno play and too much time together. The ride home was a disaster with me insisting on listening to Lynard Skynard's "Free Bird" over and over again and him smoking cigars (thanks alot 3rd Bass) in my face with no regard to my asthma.

Just a few weeks later we were back together (after some well deserved privacy) and weathering the storms of an exclusive dating relationship. My 21st birthday to see "Phantom of the Opera" in "obstructed view" seating....i.e. "wall in front of your face and you will only see the left quarter of the stage" seats. But he endured. The big break up of '94 when he needed time to decide if he was ready for marriage. But I endured. And then the month long tour to South Africa when he traveled with his group and was only able to call twice the entire time. But we endured. The trip to Alaska to meet my dad and ask for my hand in marriage. And then the proposal.

September 13th, 1996. He asked me to come out to his parents house for the evening and then we would go do something. When I arrived he had planned to take me to see the newborn baby of some friends, but he wanted to take my car. That was weird, but no big deal. Little did I know what he had planned. He drove most of the way then turned off the road. Where were we going? To Eden Park, overlooking all of Cincinnati. I started to get the picture. He pulled off to the side and we walked over to the lookout point. It was dusk. He pulled out the ring....I cant even remember what he said I was just looking at him. Of course I said "yes!" I was in shock! Then he started taking off his long sleeve shirt. What? Why are you undressing? He had gotten a tattoo with my new initials (once we were married) in graffiti on his left bicep (he's an artist, and had designed it himself). It was his way of showing me his commitment was forever, and it was beautiful. I still love seeing it to this day because it reminds me of the moment.

Married May 10th, 1997 in a beautiful but problem ridden ceremony. His ring was missing, the valet wrecked his 1965 Black Lincoln Continental with suicide doors on his way over to the ceremony, the cake was the wrong flavor, the wedding photographer didnt take photos of the family, the DJ's played the songs we requested they not play (including "Friends Are Friends Forever" by Michael W. Smith.) But it was beautiful. His sister was my Maid of Honor (ok, Matron, but that's such an elderly word!) And I am so glad that is how it worked out because she truly has become one of my very best friends. She also handled all of the flowers and decorating the cake and it was an amazing job well done. My grandparents were able to be there, and it ended up being one of the last times I would see them, they passed away that November. And then we were married!

What an amazing time we have had the last 8 years, moving to Indianapolis, then Atlanta, having our first child, buying a home, seeing his music make a meaningful wave in the underground scene. God has been good to us. We have not been without problems, life is not always easy, but having my man by my side has made all the difference. I do not know where I would be if I hadnt met you, but I do know I wouldnt have enjoyed the ride nearly as much. You are my love, a gift from God, and worth every minute of my time I've spent with you. I love you and hope you have a wonderful birthday.

Monday, May 09, 2005

Well, it's official....

Im pregnant (woo-hoo?) ! I say it with the question mark because like most other women, pregnancy means sickness--at least for a few months. But nonetheless I am pregnant! Eight weeks and a few days to be exact. It has been REALLY tough not to say anything. Believe me it has taken every ounce of integrity I have to keep the secret as my husband so wished to do. Dont get me wrong, he is right! We should keep it quiet until my first appointment and just to enjoy it for a while between us. And especially with having had a miscarriage in December, we were determined to wait it out until we were sure things were on the right track. And so far everything is good. I realize there isnt much I can do if things go wrong again, it is completely out of my hands..so I will trust God day by day and hopefully see this little one sometime in December!

Like I said before, my husband is the big secret keeper. He would be a great government official. It's like Fort Knox with him. I, on the other hand, am terrible about keeping secrets. Just letting all of you know that right up front. Dont tell me anything that I dont need to know. Just ask my old high school friends. I remember one time A.W. came up to me at my locker and said "Did you know so-and-so was throwing up in the bathroom?" "What?" I said, excited about this new piece of information. I immediately found another friend who I typically walked to class with and shared my juicy tidbit. We parted ways, and just as I reached class A.W. came up to me and said, "Did you just tell (friend) what I told you? She just told me!" OOPS! Less than 5 minutes had passed! But just enough time for me to open my big mouth! Of course now I value friendships considerably more than I did back then, so I work much harder to keep quiet.

My husband is the secret keeper of all secret keepers, however. Except for one flaw, he would be the ultimate. He's sloppy. Sloppy with exposing his secrets. I will never forget the time I found a box of cookies shoved under my seat in the car. Who knows how long they had been there? But it was a pretty good secret! If only he hadnt come up against me--the ultimate sluth. (Remember not too long ago I told you my favorite writer of all time is Agatha Christie. Im known around my house for getting to the bottom of things.) Im terrible at keeping secrets because I like to solve things! I love to know the answers! Life would be so much easier for a sloppy secret keeper if it werent for me and my detective skills.

Anyway, Im pregnant! So the journey begins....

Friday, May 06, 2005


In a couple of weeks we will be taking a family vacation with my husband's family. Now granted, I am very excited about the trip, but there are a few things only a mom can truly forcast and Im a little concerned! Not only do we have to worry about every toy, medicine, play thing, play thing for the ride down, as well as snacks, food, clothes, hair things, swim things, beach things, and every other thing under the sun, we have to figure out how, where, when, we will ever get the kids to bed. I am traveling with just one, and it is amazing the planning and organization that must go into such an adventure. My friend Joy over at scrapalicio.us (see links to the right) just traveled with all three of her kids, by plane! by herself! to visit her family! I find this truly admirable. Granted, having grandparents around will lighten the load during our vacation. Nothing like built in babysitters along for the trip! But there's a lot that goes into just getting there, and hoping things go smoothly while we are there. I'll keep you posted as the big day nears!

Monday, May 02, 2005

o how embarrassing

As I made my egg-on-toast sandwich this morning it occurred to me for the first time ever just what "over easy" means. You know, "flip it over easy so it doesnt bust open and spread yolk all over the place." Where have I been? This happens to me a lot! I remember not too long ago the post I made about pronouncing words incorrectly because I sound them out when I read. I feel like that Chris Farley character on Saturday Night Live "Man, Im so stupid! What an idiot!" as I rip my hair out and slap my head in ignorance! So then I proceeded to go thru all of the "egg names" and figure them out. "Sunnyside up" hmmm, ah-ha! Keep the yellow up with a nice bubble of yolk on top. It's like subconsciously I knew it, but it arrived like an epiphany this morning. Ok, have your good laugh and your "glad Im not that dense" moment for the day! I'll try hard to boost your ego again tomorrow with another story!