tattoos

Best Cousins Ava and Luxie, October 2004

Recently we were discussing Nate's tattoo with Luxie. He has a tattoo of my initials in graffiti on his left bicep and she asked what it was. We explained in basic lingo that daddy got it to show mommy how much he loved her.

Tonight this conversation transpired between Luxie and I:

Me: "Mommy loves you."

Luxie: "Yeah. Daddy has tattoo. He loves mommy."

Me: "Yes, he got his tattoo to show mommy how much he loves her. And mommy wears her ring to show how much she loves daddy."

Luxie: "I get a tattoo for Ava." (big smile)

Me: "Oh? You want to get a tattoo to show how much you love Ava?"

Luxie: "Yeah! I get a pink one!"

In Luxie's little world cousin Ava hung the moon, made the stars to twinkle, and set the planets in their orbit. I hope they stay such sweet friends forever.

Self Portrait Tuesday 9.27

During the month of December 1997 Nate and I, along with the rest of "Dead Poet Society" traveled to England on tour. DPS was the hip-hop group Nate DJ'd for from about 1996 to 2000. The group consisted of Rahlo (now of The Blacksoil Project) and Nobul, (who now goes by the name Thinking--originally from England he planned the tour and now lives there with his wife working in the arts/music arena.) I handled sound for the guys.

This photo was taken the morning of our arrival after an 8 hour flight. We had just arrived at the little Bed and Breakfast Nate and I were to stay in and he took this shot as I was gazing out the window. It was surreal, really, because the few weeks prior to the trip had been overwhelmingly difficult. My grandfather passed away from a stroke November 14th, and Nate and I had traveled back to Washington from Indianapolis to attend the funeral and help my mom and grandma handle the situation. After arriving home around the 21st we began preparations for the tour, only to learn on the 25th that my grandmother had entered the hospital. She passed away on the 28th, just three days before we were to leave.

I was so torn as to what was the right thing to do. Should I stay back and attend the funeral? My mom was not well at the time, and the idea of going overseas after she had just lost both of her parents seemed inappropriate and scary. In the end, my family encouraged me to go, saying there was not much I could do and that they supported my decision to go. I remember feeling so wrong about going, but also feeling that I had to go. The situation at home was under control and there was nothing I could do to change it.

So for the first time in my life I headed off to another country with my new husband (we had only been married since May.) It was a beautiful morning, a beautiful little Inn. I was so tired, so anxious, so overwhelmed, but so thankful to be there.

Quote of the Week

I love Proverbs. Somewhat random thoughts one after another that can really make you think about many different aspects of your life, from troublesome neighbors to money, overeating to the state of your heart. Occasionally I will choose to read thru the book of Proverbs in the Bible, which has so much wisdom to offer. Like hundreds of little fortune cookies listed one after another (except these nuggets were ordained by God :) The book of Proverbs was written by King Solomon around 950 BC for the purpose of "attaining wisdom and discipline," and that is exactly what happens when you read it--you gain wisdom and insight into how you might become more disciplined in your life.

Once I wrote down every Proverb that pertained to wives, and wow there were some doosies! This was one of those readings that made me pause and examine myself. I like when something I read does that for me.

"A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day;
restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil with the hand."
Proverbs 27:15-16

what we're watching...

Each fall that a new season of television begins I sit down and make a list of the shows that sound interesting or that I really enjoyed the year before. I visit each network's website and write down the day and time the show should run as well as the station so I can find it. I realize this is a bit ridiculous, but I really enjoy researching the shows and discovering new little gems!

Honestly, I was a little wary about posting what we will be watching (or begin watching, anyway....sometimes the shows are a little disappointing, right?) But I figure we all have guilty pleasures, so here are a few of ours:

MONDAYS
8:00 Arrested Development
8:30 Kitchen Confidential
9:00 Prison Break

Arrested Development happens to be one of my husband's favorite shows, and I find it very funny too, although I havent watched it much. Kitchen Confidential is a new show out this season about a chef trying to make a comback with a crew of misfits. It was Ok, probably not one I would hate to miss, but it is a good filler for the 8:30 slot. And Prison Break has been really interesting! I actually really like the concept, Im not much in to prison dramas, but this one has just enough mystery to intrigue me. Basically, a guy pretends to hold up a bank to be put in prison alongside his brother, who has been framed for a crime and is due to be executed in 30 days. He has this elaborate plan to bust his brother out, and each episode he runs into trials that could mess up the entire plan. Worth giving it a try if you are looking for something Monday nights.


TUESDAYS
8:00 (Rerun) America's Next Top Model
9:00 My Name Is Earl
9:30 The Office

Ok, Next Top Model is just plain fun--the original episode airs Wednesdays at 8:00 I believe, but we have other plans that night so we have decided to wait to watch til the following Tuesday when they rerun the episode. Earl is supposed to be one of the best new comedies this year, so we are going to give it a try. Ive heard the first episode was really funny but we were watching the Rockstar: INXS finale at the time it aired so we will try to catch up this week. The Office is great. As fans of the original series, and having watched the American version last season, I can honestly say I really like this show. I hope it makes it.


WEDNESDAYS
8:00 Martha Stewart's The Apprentice
9:00 LOST

Alright, we are giving Martha the benefit of the doubt. The show is set up exactly like the Donald Trump version, so if you like the original format you will like hers too. She's not as intimidating as The Don, but the applicants are certainly as irritating and fun to watch as the others. LOST is one of my favorites, not his, although he does like to be filled in on what happens. I just love a show that has a little mystery, a little suspense, keeps rolling with new storylines, and doesnt bore me. It is unlike anything else (or was, until this new television season started) so it has been really enjoyable for me to watch. The new season started this week and the first episode pulled me right back in!


THURSDAYS
8:00 Survivor/ALIAS
9:00 The Apprentice

Survivor is our top priority on Thursdays, having been fans since the beginning. I was originally a big ALIAS fan, season 1 was so good, but it has slowly gone away from the original concept and the storyline has been quite inconsistent so I have lost some interest in it. So we will probably be taping it to watch over the weekend just for fun. The mystery regarding Michael Vaughn's "First of all, my name isnt Michael Vaughn" statement just before the car crash finale last spring will be resolved soon, and I really hope it brings the show back to its original intrigue. Of course The Apprentice is just pure reality fun.

Other than that, there isnt much excitement over the weekend for us. I will say there are some other shows that I have heard great things about, but havent taken the time to view, including:

Veronica Mars
Everybody Hates Chris
Invasion
Entourage
The Comeback (recently cancelled)

Anyhoo, that's how we are spending most of our evenings--what about you? Any other favorites out there?

Self Portrait Tuesday 9.20

Hmm. What can I say about this photo. I actually had some others lined up for today--more attractive/feel good photos, but didnt get them scanned in time. So I ran thru my iphotos library and found this one from Christmas 2002. Why did I pick it? Well, if truth be told, it sums up how I spend my Christmas pretty well! One of the great things about the family I married into is that each Christmas Eve they have a party, nothing fancy, but a big time tradition, at which certain favorite music, videos, and foods are served up in great fun. This happens to be the table of goodies for that year, and as you can see I am thoroughly enjoying myself! I was about 7 months pregnant at the time, a perfect excuse for diving right in to the BBQ hot dogs, chips and dip, calzones, and what have you. I guess this photo captures how I feel right now at months pregnant. Food is on the mind, and there's just no stopping me.

Quote of the Week

Each weekend I have decided to do a "quote of the week" inspired by Meridith over at non sequitor (again, I apologize for my missing links as well as my inability to properly post them in my blog...)

I have never been very big into poetry, although I fully and completely respect it as an art, but occasionally I find a piece that really touches me. So with that, here is this week's quote.


I walked a mile with Pleasure, She chattered all the way;
But left me none the wiser, For all she had to say.
I walked a mile with Sorrow And ne'er a word said she;
But, oh, the things I learned from her
When Sorrow walked with me!
~Robert Browning Hamilton

GROSS!

Today after loading Luxie into the car, I walked toward the back of it to go around to my side and walked straight into a GIANT SPIDER'S WEB! AAAAAA! I hate spiders! I immediately launched into the biggest freak out of the century, shaking my head from side to side, bending over and clawing at my hair, face and back, all while screaming out such ridiculous things as "oh my gosh! oh my gosh!" "aaaaaaaaaah!" "ick ick ick ick ICK!" "gross, so gross, so gross." And as ridiculous as I might have appeared to anyone watching, I didnt care. All that kept running thru my mind was "MUST GET SPIDER OFF OF ME! MUST GET SPIDER OFF OF ME!"

After settling down a bit I glanced up at what remained of the web and there sat the biggest, hairiest spider I have seen in a long time. Thank the LORD he wasnt on me, but just the sight of him was enough to send me into another gross out episode. I thru a couple of sticks at him in an attempt to thoroughly destroy the web (OK, more to show him who was boss) because you know he will just start rebuilding the minute you walk away and then the very next day another huge, elaborate web will be right across the path again. Every little tickle on my skin is obviously a spider now, and I've not stopped having the willies every since it happened. OOOO! I hate spiders.

Self Portrait Tuesday 9.13

It was day two, March 6 to be exact. She was born on a Wednesday night at 11:45pm. I had gone in Tuesday evening around 5pm to be induced, completely naive as to what the next 48 hours would hold. After a worthless night of sleep the nurse awakened me at 6am Wednesday morning to start the pitosin, and by 10:30am I had reached about 3cm dialated. By 2pm I was only 5cm, and from about 5pm to 10pm I was stuck at 7cm, not budging. The doctor explained my options to me, and let me know that "the baby" (we waited to find out if she was a boy or girl) was showing some signs of stress. At 10:30pm we agreed to a c-section.

This photo was taken the next morning. I say I was completely naive going into it because although I knew the cold, hard facts, I had no idea what a rollercoaster of feelings and emotions I was in for. From wide-eyed optimism to overwhelming exhaustion; unfathomable fear to sleep deprived delirium; overwhelming responsibility to untangible love. I felt like I'd been run over by a truck, been turned inside-out, been pulled out of one dimension and plopped down into a whole new life in the course of a day. It was as if some weird scales had been ripped off my eyes and the world was brand new. Life as I'd known it would never again be the same.

But at the same time, the love I felt for this little being that had just emerged from my body was inexplicable. I had witnessed a miracle first hand, and been given full responsibility of it. The memory of it all still overwhelms me.

My Girl

Here she is, playing on the firetruck at the park. I cant believe she is 2 1/2 now and more like a girl than a toddler or baby! This has been an exciting week for us because the biggest event in the life of a two year old has begun...potty training.

I wanted to start a few months ago but with the pregnancy I was feeling so icky that I just couldnt bring myself to begin. So now that Im in the "glory days" of pregnancy (if there are any : ) I jumped to it. It is my goal to have the whole thing accomplished before the new baby arrives in December.

So we went out and bought the neat "undies" and made a big deal about "tomorrow we are going to wear our undies and go potty on the toilet like a big girl!" Just as planned the next morning we changed her out of her diaper, put on her undies and let her run around the house without her clothes on. That day we went thru all seven pairs of underwear due to accidents! But I could tell she was becoming more aware of her body and what made the mess! At the end of the day I put her diaper on her before bed and just before we put her down she asked "I can go potty in my diaper?" I was so impressed! In that short period of time she had realized the concept of waiting before going!

Yesterday was day two and I was soooo proud of her--not one accident! She went potty in her little chair 4 times throughout the day, only wearing her diaper at nap time and bed time. It was very cute watching her play, then suddenly dash thru the house to her potty chair and make it just in time, thrilled to be rewarded with a marshmallow for her great accomplishment! (She LOVES marshmallows.) That afternoon I needed to get a couple of things at the store for dinner and she refused to wear a diaper, so we ventured out in her underwear and she made it home without a problem! I must have asked her 50 times if she had to go!

I realize that this is only the beginning and there will be accidents to come, especially with bedtimes, but I am so thankful that the concept is real to her! That, to me, was half the battle. I feel such relief over the whole situation-- I think we just might get it done before December!

Self Portrait Tuesday

We're home safe and sound...and my fall adventure begins with Self Portrait Tuesday. Yes, I have decided to participate after becoming intrigued with the whole thing while reading some of my friends' blogs. I admit it was tough deciding just what to post on this big day, especially since I dont have any recent photos of myself ALONE. It seems every photo we have of me around here is with Luxie or Nate. I look forward to seeing what I come up with in the next few weeks!

This particular shot was taken in June of 2002. Nate and I decided at the last minute to use my one week of summer vacation from work to go on a cruise. We are somewhere along the Mexican coast in a newly developed port that I cant remember the name of. What made this cruise so special? unique? was that we had just found out we were pregnant with our first child.

That day at work (a Friday) I started feeling kinda woozy off and on, but thought it was just jitters about the trip. We were leaving around 6pm that evening to drive 10 hours to Cape Canaveral to board our cruise the next morning. I assumed I was anxious and nervous--after all, it had been a last minute decision and pretty expensive! By the time I got home from work I had some suspicions about just what kind of illness was coming on. I talked Nate into getting a pregnancy test before leaving town, and he agreed, assuming it would be negative like it had been so many times before. But it wasnt! The line was just faint enough to detect and both of us were in shock. Needless to say the 10 hr drive was not quite as happy-go-lucky as we had imagined it would be. Nate still didnt want to believe the test, and upon boarding the cruise ship I submitted to two more pregnancy tests--both positive.

The week was wonderful, despite our minds racing over what the next 9 months would hold. I guess I see this photo as the "girl" me, before I really became a woman. I seem so carefree, so rested, so young...even though it was just 3 years ago. I feel so much older now, and wiser. But I've always loved what this picture represents. The last days of just me and Nate.

Time flies

Well, I am finally flying home tomorrow with my Luxie Lu--prayers are much appreciated. We were originally intended to head home Monday, but with fears of Katrina heading over Atlanta, and fears of being stuck in Salt Lake City with a two year old for a couple of days, I postponed my flight til tomorrow. I am anxious over the whole event, and about the looming gas prices. Over $3.50 a gallon now! Guess we will be stuck finding stuff to do at home rather than running about town!

I am excited to get home for several reasons. The biggest reason being fall is coming. Yes, it is a ways off, but a new season means new things to do, and fall means the holidays are approaching, the new baby is coming, and cooler weather in the Southeast. We have so many things happening before the end of the year and I am really looking forward to it all. We hope to take a trip to Nate's parents' home (if we can afford it with gas prices so high!) Im embarrassed to say Luxie has never been there, but it will be a nice little get away as a family and I know she will have a wonderful time. Then, mid October we usually head to the Georgia mountains with Nate's sister Andrea and her family to pick out our pumpkins at this great big pumpkin farm. Last year we had to cancel due to illness so I am really looking forward to it! Of course the end of October means Halloween, and I think Luxie will really be able to participate in picking out her costume and trick-or-treating this year, so again, it should be lots of fun.

After that it's November, with it's deliciously chilly weather, and Thanksgiving and Christmas on the way. The time will fly, especially with hopes of having Luxie potty trained before the new baby girl arrives in December. Ok, Ok, so I am really jumping ahead here. But I love having things to do, events on the calendar, stuff to look forward to, and upon arrival tomorrow evening at the Atlanta airport my new adventures begin.